I'd Prefer Cat Fancy

A while back, I mentioned how ridiculous I think it is to feed former Jane readers Glamour magazine-- which literally uses headlines like "He still hasn’t proposed? This famous chicken recipe just might do the trick!" --for the remainder of their subscriptions. Over the course of the last few months, I totally forgot it was coming. Yesterday I received my first copy of said shitty replacement in the mail.

My first thought was "WTF? I would never have drunkenly ordered this."
Then I thought maybe some misguided relative had me mistaken for a PR assistant from Connecticut who has missionary sex with the lights off and bought me a subscription for Christmas.
Then I remembered that this was my consolation prize.

During an ensuing stretch-and-bitch session with Ashley Info, I flipped through the rag and found half the editorial space dedicated to a massive feature on "What Guys Really Think!"
Oh. My. God.
Seriously? If you haven't figured out by now what the four thoughts guys think are, you're developmentally retarded. Not to mention-- how many of Jane's readers were lesbians? Bet they LOOOVED that article.
This after I was directed to "Splurge!" on a lame looking blazer for $475 and look hot for less in a coat from the Amanda Bynes collection.
Fuck you, Conde Nast.