Breeds of Model

I'm as big a fan of America's Next Top Model as the next girl, don't get me wrong, but I'd bet you my left leg that no cotestant-- or even winner--will ever book a high fashion campaign or show. Why? They're pretty girls. And only freaks and celebuspawn make it in high fashion.

If you don't believe me, check out Style.com's new article "The Ten" about the 10 teenage skeletons du jour dominating the runways and billboards this fall. Every one of them looks to be the offspring of a human and a creature from Lord of the Rings.

Here is my advice to the contestants of America's Next Top Model, and anyone else aspiring to strut a catwalk in the presence of Anna Wintour and her ridiculous wig:
A good litmus test for whether or not you're high fashion is whether or not frat guys want to bone you. If they do, don't plan on booking that Dior campaign.